Saturday, January 21, 2006

Riise you LEGEND!

LIVERPOOL star John Arne Riise has shown his loyalty to the Kop - by having a tattoo on his arm of FIVE European Cups.

The Norwegian star decided to show his colours by having a memento of the historic Champions League success printed on his right forearm.

However Riise is still in pain after needle work - he was spotted sporting a bandage on his arm above the newly designed at the weekend.

But Riise will be showing off his new badge of honour when the Reds face United tomorrow.

Oh and he's also
signed an extension to his contract.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Babe of the Day: Naomi Watts

Irish Palm Pilot

Steven Gerrard's Home

How you know you experienced the 90's:

1) 10p Mr Frosty Ice Pops on long summer days!
2) Gordon the Gopher!
3) You could do or tried to do the Prodigy step. 'You're no good 4 me....'
4) You owned or longed for an Adidas three stripe tracksuit
5) You owned a compilation tape with TOP TUNES such as "Mr Vain", "What is love" and "Rhythm is a dancer" and 'How Bizarre, How Bizarre"
6) Girls thought Blue Mascara was cool!
7) Girls actually fancied Garry Barlow more than Robbie Williams
8) The Racoons! (nuff said)
9) You owned a pair of Nike Air Max, and wore them to death
10) Mr Motivator (What ever happened to him?)
11) Running on the spot dancing!
12) You wore leggings/cycling shorts with long t-shirts
13) You owned a Bennetton, NafNaf, sweater shop jumper or waistcoat
14) Girls owned scrunchies in an array of colours and tacky headbands with their names written on in thick glitter
16) You bought Smash Hits for the song lyrics and the immense amount of stickers that you would stick everywhere!
17) You had a pen pal
18) You could only watch the Simpson's on sky
19) On a Saturday afternoon you watched Catchphrase, Gladiators, Generation Game, Noels House Party and then Casualty
20) You taped the Pepsi Chartshow on radio one and tired in vain to pause the tape before the annoying guy talked and ruined the whole thing.
21) Cans of Coke were 25p
22) 10p Space Raiders Crisps
23) A grey Fruit of the Loom jumper was a must have
24) Sharkie & George were the crimebusters of the sea
25) Puffa jackets
26) You used the line "it's a free country" every day
27) The Sky Sports Blimp!
28) Impulse body spray for girls
29) Hooch Alcoholic Lemonade (where's it gone?!)
30) 'Don't forget your toothbrush', 'TFI' and Big Breakfast with Chris Evans
31) You had at least one troll
32) You know the dance to Macarena and Saturday Night. Youalso tried to scat like Scatman John! Bi bat ba ba da bo...
33) You watched Baywatch and longed for the day that Eddie & Sharni got together!
34) You watched Byker Grove 'ha ha ha whatcha laughin at!' (the themesong ending), and saw PJ get shot in the eye with a paintball!
35) PJ and Duncan not Ant and Dec! Dodgy Pop Not Dodgy Presenting!
36) Shellsuits & bumbags!
37) You longed to live in Beverley Hills 90210
38) Home and Away was a prime time ITV programe watched by millions
39) You owned a Spice Girls album
40) Fruit salads and black jacks!
41) Strike it lucky on a sunday night with Michael Barrymore when he was straight & married
42) Chain letters
43) You had fake ID
44) You remember Todd Landers in Neighbours
45) You religiously watched Saved by the Bell on a Saturday morning!
46) You more than likely lost/nearly lost a wobbly tooth on a wham bar!!
47) CK one (probably the fake one from the market)
48) Going Live, then Live and Kicking was the place to be on a Saturday Morning - you know you remember the number 0181 811 8181
49) You knew every word to the theme tune from Fresh Prince of Bel Air
50) You collected Premier League Stickers and did swoops at playtime
51) Girls wore crappy lipstick such as - coffee shimmer, heather shimmer and birthday suit!
52) You wore kickers and wallaby's with the tags hanging from them
53) You thought saying - "I know you are, you said you are but what am I" to every cuss that came your way!
54) "love got the world in motion" with the John Barnes Rap
55) when you used to run away from some thing and shout ' leg iiiiiitt'

You loved the 90's!!

Link of the Day

Man Utd v Liverpool, the buildup

Even the PENGUINS love Liverpool!

Notice something different?

Okay I know I shouldn't laugh at this but the latest twist in this pic is quality. I'm goin to hell aren't I.

Thursday, January 19, 2006


Wednesday, January 18, 2006


With the biggest game in the English Premiership only coming up this Sunday, here's a little something to put you in the right mood.

Best 5 Defences (Goals conceded)
Chelsea 11
Liverpool 11
Arsenal 15
Tottenham 19
Man. Utd. 20

Nickname: The Red Devils - others might call Fans the 'Glory Hunters'

Q: Did you hear that the British Post Office has just recalled their latest stamps?
A: Well, they had photos of Manchester United players on them - folk couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

Q: What has Old Trafford on a Saturday afternoon at 4.45pm got in common with Wormwood Scrubs Prison?
A: They are both full of cockneys trying to get out.

Q: How many Man U fans does it take to pave up a driveway?
A: Depends how thin you slice them.

Q. What would you call a pregnant Man United fan?
A: A dope carrier.

Sir Alex is queuing in his local building society, when a gunman bursts in through the door demanding money. Ferguson attempts to tackle the raider, but gets knocked he falls, his head smashes the counter and Sir Alex is out cold. The robber escapes and the cashier tries to revive Ferguson. After a few minutes he comes round and looks bewildered. His first words are "Where the hell am I?". The Cashier replies: "don't worry, its ok, you're in the Nationwide." Ferguson replies, "F**k me, is it May already?"

Q. What do you call a Manchester United fan with half a brain?
A: Gifted.

Q: How many Man United fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 560,001. That is 1 to change it, 60,000 to say they've been changing it for years and 500,000 to buy the replica kit.

Michael Barrymore has offered Manchester United £1 million pounds to play as their striker because he wants 10 pricks behind him and 67,000 assholes jumping up and down.

Q: What do Manchester fans use as birth control?
A: Their personalities.

Q: What do Beckham and Posh Spice both have in common?
A: Both are f**ing bad singers!!!

Q: How many Man U supporters does it take to stop a moving Bus?
A: Never enough.

Q: What's the difference between Alex Ferguson and God?
A: God doesn't think he's Alex Ferguson.

Q: What do you call a Mancunian with no arms and legs?
A: Trustworthy.

Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead Man Utd. fan?
A: Skid marks in front of the dog.

Q: What's the difference between a Man-U fan and a Vibrator?
A: A Man U fan is a real dick

BREAKING NEWS: Thierry Henry Breaks Leg!

It could end his career.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Babe of the Day: Rachel Bilson

Rachel Bilson: Photo Gallery

Top 10 Icons of Liverpool FC

As the nation continues to debate what cultural icons best represent our national heritage we can reveal that Anfield anthem 'You'll Never Walk Alone' has been voted the definitive icon of Liverpool Football Club.

Last week we asked visitors to this website what or who they considered to be the most powerful symbol of LFC.

And in what was a fiercely competitive poll the Gerry Marsden classic just pipped the Liver Bird to number one spot.

The world-famous Spion Kop came third, while current Reds captain Steven Gerrard attracted more votes than Liverpool's modern day founding father Bill Shankly.

There was also a place in the top 10 for every Liverpudlians favourite trophy – the European Cup!

The top 10 Icons of Liverpool FC in full...

2. Liver Bird
3. The Kop
4. Anfield
5. Steven Gerrard
6. Bill Shankly
7. All-red kit
8. Shankly Gates
9. The European Cup
10. Hillsborough flame

Link of the Day: Yank College Chicks Gallery

Whisky Tango Foxtrot is the premier online repository for pictures of dogs in bee costumes.

Extreme Christian Movie Reviews

American Pie: The movie starts out with a teen boy watching a porn flick on cable TV (audio present) -- and he is doing that which the entertainment industry and pansexualists want you to think about what teenage boys do if watching sexual material alone in their bedroom. The boy also performed this act with an apple pie, thus the name of the show. There are scenes with all the sounds and motions of oral sex -- more than once. One of the recipients of this 'favor' deposited into a cup of beer which was later drank by another boy. I am sorry folks, but it was there! Right on the screen! And if your kids go to see this movie, they will see and hear it! Plain and simple. There is much, much more regarding the attention to detail the producers went to, but I WILL NOT speak of that.

There were a lot of sexual offers, requests, and invitations; lots of bragging of sexual conquest, planning of sexual conquest, and BEING a sexual conquest; and talk, comments, and innuendo about sex. And on top of that there were at least four instances of teen drinking. And rear male nudity. Who knows (or cares) about what was in the rest of the show? I will never know. :o)

Almost forgot. The most foul of foul words? Yes, eight times. God's name in vain? Yes, six times. Teen drinking? Yes, four times. And much more. In just 44 minutes.

Thousands more here

Monday, January 16, 2006



Michael Barrymore on Big Bro

Big Bro producers are to give Barrymore his own ashtray so he won't have to throw his used fags in the pool.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Babe of the Day - Maria Menounos

Man Boobs

Welcome to Man Boobs, the site that says "We're fat and we're proud"
and then quickly puts its T-shirt back on.

One for the Laydees

Who Needs a Man ?

If you want someone who will do anything to please you, get a dog.

If you want someone who will bring you the newspaper without tearing through it first for the sports page, get a dog.

If you want someone who'll make a total fool of himself because he's so glad to see you, get a dog.

If you want someone who eats whatever you put in front of him and never says his mother made it better, get a dog.

If you want someone who's always eager to go out any time you ask and anywhere you want to go, get a dog.

If you want someone who can scare away burglars without waving a lethal weapon around, endangering you and all the neighbours, get a dog.

If you want someone who never touches the remote, couldn't care less about Monday Night Football, and watches dramatic movies with you as long as you want, get a dog.

If you want someone who'll be content just to snuggle up and keep you warm in bed, and who you can kick out of bed if he slobbers and snores, get a dog.

If you want someone who never criticizes anything you do, doesn't care how good or bad you look, acts as though every word you say is worth hearing, never complains, and loves you unconditionally all the time, get a dog!

On the other hand...

If you want someone who never comes when you call him, totally ignores you when you walk in the room, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, prowls around all night and come home only to eat and sleep all day, and acts as though you are there only to see that He's happy...

Get a CAT!

Now just fucking concentrate.

Great Truths


1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.


1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.


1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.


1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.


At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . having a drivers licence.
At age 35 success is . . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . . having money.
At age 70 success is . .. . having a drivers licence.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.

Top Tips from The Goose

1. If a small child is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down its throat and hey presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed.

2. Before attempting to remove stubborn stains from a garment, always circle the stain in permanent pen, so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain and check that it has gone.

3. Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand next to the object you wish to view.

4. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

5. Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.


Kylie's rear

I don't think I need to add an explanation to these pictures. More pics here. [via]

Liverpool 1 - 0 Spurs

Joke of the Day

Man goes to see the Doctor
"Doctor I think I have caught that bird flu that's going around"
"What makes you think that sir"
"Well I've started wearing make up, talking bollocks and can't park the car"
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