Saturday, July 09, 2005

Babe of the Day - Vida Guerra

More Vida Guerra photos

Wrexham v Liverpool

An un-convincing 4-3 victory for Liverpool. However, two people who will be crucial next season if Liverpool are to mount a serious title-challege, Morientes and Baros, got 2 goals each. Here's the match report.

Our new away kit.

Strange things guys do in the bathroom

If you are female, there is a lot of things you probably don't know about guys' bathroom habits. Guys do lots of weird things in there and I wanted to compile a list of all of them. Any suggestions, post them in 'comments' or email me or keep it for yourself so you can add something extra when plagiarize this article in your blog.

1. The urinal buffer zone - Guys will often stand one urinal away from the next guy when going in a public bathroom. Is it because we are scared we may look over at another guy's johnson or do we not want to get the urine of others splashed all over our pants? Nobody knows.

2. The race - Sometimes I will flush the toilet right as I start to pee. I try to race the toilet to see if I can finish peeing before the water completely flushes.

3. The porcelain mute - While peeing, if you aim for the porcelain inside the toilet instead of the water, it makes a lot less noise. Does everyone do this or am I just weird?

4. The soap puck - When peeing in a urinal that has one of those pink soap bars at the bottom, it is fun to pee on the edge of it to make it move. I don't know why.

5. The little kids ass - Usually little kids don't know how to use the zipper or the little hole through underwear, so they'll pull their pants all the way down to their ankles when using a urinal. So often times, you'll walk into the bathroom and get an eye full of some little kid's ass.

6. Watering the plants - When peeing outside near a plant, I don't usually pee just around the plant or at the base of it. For some reason I feel a strange urge to cover the entire plant in urine... no idea why.

7. The melt - When peeing in a urinal that has ice in it, it is (for some reason) fun to see how much ice you can melt before you're finished.

Guys you've met in the Men's room
Has been posted before but a classic still.
Excitable - Shorts half twisted around, can't find hole, rips shorts.
Sociable - Joins friends and pisses whether he has to or not, figures it doesn't cost anything.
Cross-eyed - Looks in the urinal on the left, pisses in the middle, and flushes the one on the right.
Timid - Can't piss if someone is watching. Flushes and comes back later.
Indifferent - All urinals are being used, pisses in sink.
Clever - Look Ma, no hands! Fixes tie, looks around and pisses on floor.
Worried - Not sure if he has been in lately, stops in for a quick check.
Frivolous - Plays stream up, down, and across urinals, tries to hit a bug on the wall.
Childish - Pisses directly in the bottom of urinal, likes to see it bubble.
Absent-minded - Opens vest, pulls out tie, pisses in pants.
Sneak - Farts silently while pissing, acts very innocent, knows guy in next stall will get blamed.
Patient - Stands very close for a long time waiting, reads a newspaper with his free hand.
Desperate - Waits in long line, teeth floating, pisses in pants.
Tough - Bangs dick on side of urinal to dry it.
Efficient - Waits until he has to crap, then does both.
Fat - Backs up and takes long shot at urinal, pisses on his shoe.
Drunk - Holds left thumb in right hand, pisses in pants.
Disgruntled - Stands waiting for a long time, gives up, walks away.
Conceited - Holds two inch dick like baseball bat.
The Goose - Takes a piss while staring at ceiling only to find out he has pissed all over his shirt that was hangin down when he thought he had hold of it

Which one are you then??


This time its about callers to tech-support. Most of this is probably ancient but its still funny.

Tech Support: "Customer Support, this is David, may I help you?"
Customer: "Hello, yes, it's me."
Tech Support: "Oh, it's me too." [chuckle]
Customer: "No, Esmie. E, s, m, i, e."
Tech Support: "Oh, sorry."


Tech Support: "Type 'fix' with an 'f'."
Customer: "Is that 'f' as in 'fix'?"


Customer: "How do you spell 'Internet America'? Is there a space between 'inter' and 'net'?"
Tech Support: "No space between 'inter' and 'net'. It's spelled normally."
Customer: "Ok. A-M-E-R-I-C-K?"
Tech Support: "That's A-M-E-R-I-C-A."
Customer: "I-C-K???"
Tech Support: "'A' as in apple"
Customer: "There's no 'K' in apple!"


Tech Support: "Tell me, is the cursor still there?"
Customer: "No, I'm alone right now."


Tech Support: "Tell me, is the cursor still there?"
Customer: "No, I'm alone right now."


Customer: "Right, this computer's gone all crazy. It's blinking, beeping, and doing all sorts of stuff!"
Him: "What were you doing with the computer at the time?"
Customer: "I was dusting it."


Tech Support: "Ok, ma'am, do you see the button on the right hand side of your mouse?"
Customer: "No, there's a printer and a phone on the right hand side of my mouse."

Friday, July 08, 2005

Yes But No But Yes But No But YESSSS!!

Both Steven Gerrard and Jamie Carragher have
signed new 4 year contracts with Liverpool.

Atleast Stevie G can now buy new polo-shirts with the extra money he'll be earning!
This is from 3 days ago.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

There's nothing Islamic about Al Qaeda

A previously unknown group calling itself the "Secret Organization group al Qaeda Organization in Europe" released a statement Thursday claiming responsibility for the subway and bus bombings in London earlier in the day. (Full story)

NO religion in the world can justify a barbaric act such as this. Muslims around the world
condemn this horrible act of terrorism.

"If anyone slew an innocent person it would be as if he slew the whole mankind and if anyone saved a life it would be as if he saved the life of the whole mankind"
[Al-Qur’an 5:32]

“…take not life, which God hath made sacred, except by way of justice and law: thus doth He command you, that ye may learn wisdom.”
[Al- Quran 6:151]

Quran forbids the killing of innocent people. Full stop. I'm sick and tired of these so called 'Jehadi' organisations that have hijacked our peaceful religion. Osama - Please just fuck off. You have nothing to do with Islam or Muslims. You're a cunt, face it.

Mr Blair, thanks for bringing this war home. This was NOT our war, you're the one responsible of all the deaths and carnage in London today.

America had 9/11 because there were a lot of people fucking pissed off about America's support of Israel.

We've had this because of our involvement in the murder of thousands of innocent civilians in Afghanistan and Iraq. Because of Abu Gharaib. Because of Guantanamo. If you're gonna fuck up other people's lives, someone will wanna fuck up yours too. Its that simple.

My heart goes out to the victims of these tragedies as its them who have to suffer the consequences of the actions of their leaders.

You LIED to get us into this war, and now we, the people are having to pay the price. We are NOT the police of the world, so lets not try and do that. We cannot impose our values and way of life on the rest of the world. Lets face it, it does come with negatives as well as positives and some people don't want this. They don't want our 'freedoms' and our 'liberties'. They're happy with what they have so lets NOT try and tell them what to do. That will only result in pissing people off. Trying to force them will only result in Osama being able to recruit lots more who will be willing to bomb our buses and trains and kill our loved ones.

click to enlarge
6 untitled 04

_41277977_under_reader_people _41279649_kx300 _41277651_bus_side

From BBC
In detail: What happened
Muslim leaders join condemnation
Hundreds treated following blasts
In quotes: UK reaction
In quotes: World reaction
London blasts: Emergency advice
G8 statements delayed to Friday

From CNN
Blair: Killers will face justiceGroup lays claim to blastsBlair breaks off G8 summit G8 at GleneaglesWorld leaders condemn attacks GalleryBombings evoke sympathy in MideastU.S. tightens security after bombs Cities


Several people have been injured after explosions on the Underground network and double-decker buses in London.

A police spokesman said there were "quite a large number of casualties" at Aldgate Tube Station.
BBC NEWS [Live BBC NewsFeed Available]

1215 The ambulance service says there are people still trapped at King's Cross station, and efforts are being made to rescue them

1210 The BBC's Security Correspondent Frank Gardner says BBC monitoring services have located a website linked to al-Qaeda with a 200-word statement saying it carried out the bombings

1205 Prime Minister Tony Blair, at the G8 summit in Gleneagles, says there has been "a series of terrorist attacks in London... people have died and are seriously injured... It is reasonably clear this is designed and timed to coincide with the opening of the G8". He says he will return to London within hours, but that the summit will continue without him


Edgware Road
King's Cross
Liverpool Street
Russell Square
Aldgate East

1205 The Bishop of London, Richard Chartres, said: "This is a grave day for London. Our thoughts and prayers are with the injured and bereaved"

1200 Israeli embassy in London placed under a state of emergency, amid reports of all phone lines being down, Associated Press says.

1130 Signs on major roads into London warn: "Avoid London. Area closed. Turn on radio"

1126 The president of the European Parliament, Josep Borrell, blames terrorism for a "co-ordinated series of attacks" and "confirmed deaths"

1125 "We have at least two fatalities, but still unconfirmed," a police spokesman tells the AFP news agency

1118 London's Metropolitan Police Commissioner Sir Ian Blair tells the BBC he knows of "about six explosions", one on a bus and the others related to Underground stations. He says he believes the six affected areas are Edgware Road, King's Cross, Liverpool Street, Russell Square, Aldgate East and Moorgate, but says it is "still a confusing situation". He advises Londoners to "stay where you are - all of London's transport is currently disabled" - he refuses to confirm any fatalities

1055 A doctor tells Reuters there are at least 90 casualties at Aldgate station

1053 Home Secretary Charles Clarke makes a statement outside Downing Street about "dreadful incidents" causing "terrible injuries". He says Prime Minister Tony Blair has been informed and advises the public in London not to make unnecessary journeys

1051 A passenger on a train at Edgware Road says he saw several bodies in the wreckage. A police spokesman says two trains remained stuck in tunnels at Edgware Road

1049 Police say there are serious casualties, but no deaths are confirmed, Associated Press reports

1039 All London hospitals have been put on major incident alert, a hospital spokesman tells PA

1025 Transport union officials say they have reports of explosions on three buses, PA says

1025 PA reports two buses damaged in explosions - one in Russell Square and another in Tavistock Square. Witness, Belinda Seabrook said of the Russell Square blast: "I was on the bus in front and heard an incredible bang, I turned round and half the double decker bus was in the air"

1025 The BBC's Andrew Marr, with the prime minister in Gleneagles, says Number 10 is "still unsure" whether the explosions are a terrorist attack

1023 British Transport Police confirm an explosion on a bus in Tavistock Place

1021 Scotland Yard reports "multiple explosions" in London, the Press Association reports

1014 An eyewitness tells PA that a bus has been ripped apart in an explosion in central London

1009 Witness Christina Lawrence, who was on a train leaving Kings Cross, tells BBC News 24: "There was a loud bang in the tunnel and the train just stopped and all of a sudden it was filled with black, gassy smoke and we couldn't breathe"

1002 Scotland Yard says it is dealing with a "major incident"

0940 British Transport Police say power surge incidents have occurred on the Underground at Aldgate, Edgware Road, King's Cross, Old Street and Russell Square stations

0933 London Underground reports "another incident at Edgware Road" station, PA reports

0933 Passengers are told that all London Underground services are being suspended because of a power fault across the network, PA reports

0924 British Transport Police say the incident was possibly caused by a collision between two trains, a power cut or a power cable exploding. Police report "walking wounded"

0915 Press Association reports emergency services called to London's Liverpool Street Station after reports of an explosion

0849 An incident on the Metropolitan Line between Liverpool Street and Aldgate is reported to British Transport Police

In pictures: London explosions Bus and Tube blasts

Witness reports of London blasts

Blair denounces 'barbaric' attack

London 2012

I've carefully sidestepped the whole Olympics thingy in the past few days as a) I think they're fucking boring anyway b) Can't really be bothered. But now they're coming to London. Is it really that good for London? Or is gonna end up in cost overruns, poor ticket sales, unused stadiums, higher taxes?

There's an interesting look at the past experiences some of the other cities have had, in last week's
TIME Magazine.

Athens is still a mess, 10 months after the Summer games were held there in 2004. Greece now has a 6% budget deficit, in breach of the European Union's stability pact, and its economic growth is projected to slow from 4.2% in 2004 to 2.8% in 2005. Athens spent about $1.5 billion on security, 12 times its original estimate.

Montreal turned a significant profit on operations alone from its hosting of the 1976 games. But don't try and convince Québécois smokers of that. Capital and infrastructure expenditures — for venues such as the Olympic Village and the stadium — spiraled so out of control that the city had to impose a $2 billion tax on tobacco to get out of its financial hole. To this day, 17¢ out of every pack of cigarettes purchased in Quebec goes to pay for Olympic construction.

There are more examples, but I aint gonna post them all here. You're either gonna have to buy your copy of Time Magazine, or
Click Here and read it for free.

This, Meanwhile is for Jacque Chirac who thinks British food sucks.

Wheres the f**king money Bremer?

At the end of the Iraq war, vast sums of money were made available to the US-led provisional authorities, headed by Paul Bremer, to spend on rebuilding the country. By the time Bremer left the post eight months later, $8.8bn of that money had disappeared. Ed Harriman on the extraordinary scandal of Iraq's missing billions

Thursday July 7, 2005

Lovers Reunited

Gerrard arriving at Anfield yesterday

Gerrard at Anfield yesterday with Rafa the Gaffa

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Babe Of The Day - Rachel Stevens

Joke of the Day

why did the condom fly across the room?

because it was pissed off!


I'm not pissed off at what he did anymore. Okay he had doubts and
didn't feel loved. Fine, even though he acted in a really immature way throwing his toys out of the pram.
But he's still Steven Gerrard, our skipper, despite having offered to give up the captain's armband because of his behaviour in the past week.

He's even promised it'll
never happen again and that he's committing himself to Anfield for life. Now that's something.

Gerrard:: I love Liverpool Too much

Gerrard to Stay

Its natural to have negative feelings towards someone who you believe has betrayed you. And while it is true that he wasn't at his best last season, I do admit that without him, we wouldn't have gotten anywhere in the CL either.

Now that he's decided to stay, apparently because of his love for the club and its fans, should he be forgiven and accepted back in our hearts?

Regarding his decision, I reckon Jamie C might've had a 'quite' word.

To be fair to Steven Gerrard, if you saw him last week at training or in the press, he looked genuinely happy. So whatever made him decide to 'leave' definately happened last weekend.

"I am delighted Steven is staying, I was speaking to him four or five days before pre-season training and there was no happier lad on Merseyside. He wanted to get a deal done, but he was a little concerned it was not done quicker. But it was only a side issue.

"He was absolutely delighted and looking forward to the start of the season.

"I don't know what happened in between, I wonder if anything was going on behind the scenes with an agent or something. I was absolutely gobsmacked on Sunday. -
Phil Thompson

Also, since we've seen Roman's taken over Chelski, clubs try to cover up their transfer market moves because of the fear that Chelski will jump in and ruin it for them by raising the prices.

This could be the main reason behind the Gerrard Story as Liverpool want to direct everybody's attention away from their actual transfer moves since they can not afford to waste anytime in negotiations unless they still think that the likes of Milan, Traore and Kewell really are world class!!

I expect surprising and good signings by Rafa in the next week..

FAO: All Chelsea Fans

Tuesday, July 05, 2005


Liverpool FC today issued the following press statement regarding Steven Gerrard.

"The club has made it crystal clear we want to keep Steven at Anfield. Sadly, he has told us this afternoon that he will not accept our offer of an improved and extended contract because he wants to leave Liverpool. We very much regret the decision he has taken."

Liverpool's 25-year-old captain delivered the news to chief executive Rick Parry after he rejected a £32m offer from champions Chelsea.

Gerrard has turned down a £100,000-a-week contract offer made by Liverpool in emergency talks on Monday.


FA cup, UEFA cup, champ league, european super cup, worthington cup twice, finished in top 4 (barring last season) for the past i dont know how many years-including a 2nd place, lots of semi finals, hes been made captain, offered £100,000 a week, supposedly the club hes always supported, reigning champs of europe, his home town, and the greatest football team ever in england - history wise... but no, he wants to go to a club who are better?

who? cheski? if/when roman leaves, that club is going bust sooo fast. how can u have a club where the whole future is based on one man. they have no past, and a future where every1 hates them, and they just buy every good player in the world once theyre already established.
real madrid? did they have a better season than liverpool? considering the amount of money theyve spent over the past 5 years, are they actually any better than what we have acheived the last 5 years?

apart from that, who is genuinley in a better position than us? Arsenal? one man team, and have about as much chance of winning the league as we do.
Man U? are they going to win the league? would they ever take to him anyway?

hes an arse-everyone should hate him, boo him for england.


2 female teachers were suspended for having a threesome with a 16-year-old male pupil. Police never pressed charges because the teenager did not complain of any crime.

The incident involving teachers from Albany School [Hornchurch, Essex] took place a day before the boy's GCSE exams started. Staff and students had been to the Harrow pub to celebrate the end of lessons before going back to a member of staff's house. It was there the teachers and the boy allegedly had sex.

A spokesman for Havering Borough Council said: "Once the London borough of Havering became aware of matters concerning members of staff at one of our schools being involved in inappropriate behaviour outside school hours it acted swiftly to initiate an investigation into those rumours."

If you're thinking what I thought at first, what a lucky bastard, let me assure you the bastard aint lucky at all.

Liverpool Reject Chelsea Bid

Chelsea in with £32 million bid for Gerrard

Chelsea and Real Madrid appear to be ready for a bidding war over Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard. The 25-year-old seems set to leave Anfield after his agents broke off from talks over a new contract and said negotiations would not be re-opened.

Newspapers claimed on Tuesday that Chelsea had made a £32m offer - which would be a new British record.

Real confirmed their interest - while Liverpool are said to have responded by making Gerrard an offer to stay.
The BBC has more

----Comment from F365 Forum----
Listening to Rafa's passionate address yesterday made me realise just what goes on behind the scenes in contract talks.

As Rafa explained that he had tried to talk to Steven Gerrard on three occasions re signing a contract extension (but had been told to wait each time) it was clear that SFX are the real trouble causers here.

It seems that everything was fine on Wednesday but for some reason as SFX and 'their' man Steven left our club the mood was changing. Now why was that?

Was it the money .... well not for Steven it wasn't although I am sure his 'representative' would earn a couple of million if he was to be sold.

So was it Rafa?...... well the passion he showed when explaining how much he wanted SG to stay proved he was innocent.

Was it Rick Parry? He has always made it clear that keeping Steven was "the club's number one priority".

Was it David Moores? No because he and Gerrard are good friends.

So who could it be? What could have changed?....Rafa told us in a very diplomatic way and as such you can picture the scene during and after Wednesday's meeting.

SG's agent must have probed and probed about Rafa's new signings during their meeting. At todays press conference when Bolo Zenden was revealed as one of four new players Rafa explained with great sincerity that Zenden was Middlesbrough's best player last year, that Reina was the best goalkeeper in Spain last year, that Gonzales was currently the best player in Chile and that he had also signed a young player (barragan) who would be great for the future of the club.

The noticeable thing was that Rafa clearly felt that his choice of players was being questioned by Gerrard and his advisers.

It seems to me that Rafa has been trying and trying to get Gerrard to commit to Liverpool for the long term but to no avail. It also seems that SFX feel that they can earn more money from selling Steven and have convinced him that Rafa hasn't brought in the players that are good enough to make Liverpool great again.

If this is the case, then I'm sorry to say the hero scouser can't see past his own importance and it is Rafa who is the one passionately behind Liverpool FC.

This could be interesting even though its from 'The Sun'.

'The Liverpool faithful were given a glimmer of hope last night when Gerrard returned to the club’s Melwood training base with his advisor Struan Marshall. The pair had talks with Benitez, Parry and chairman David Moores having previously stated that no more discussions were planned.'

Monday, July 04, 2005

Babe of the Day - Elisha Cuthbert

This is Elisha's
second BOTD title. There's a huge collection of her photos on this gallery. [Official Website]

Cool GIFS of the Day

And here's some more of the good stuff.
Girl Next Door 2 :::: Girl Next Door 3

Link of the Day

Reasons why you should never post your picture on the Interweb

Might be a li'l old for some of you but still piss funny.

Joke of the Day

Breaking News Story:

A 15 year old boy was yesterday raped by his female, 6ft, Swedish, aerobics teacher.
A representative for the boy said he would most likely be scarred for life"
He was quoted as saying. "We cant get the smile off his face"

Inside the mind of an Iraqi Suicide Bomber

Marwan says the occasional bomber may ask to be chained to the wheel to make sure he doesn't flinch at the last moment. "If you have any little doubt in your mind about your own ability to carry out the mission, you do that to make sure you don't lose your courage," he says. He scoffs at reports that some suicide bombers are intoxicated. "Those who go on these missions know that they are about to see their Creator," he says. "Do you think we would meet Allah in a state of drunkenness or drugged? It is unthinkable."

this disturbing report by TIME Magazine

Breaking News

Liverpool skipper Steven Gerrard looks set to leave Anfield after his agent said talks over a new deal had broken down and were unlikely to start again. BBC Sport

Rafa Benitez, however, has insisted he wants Gerrard to stay at Anfield.

It's all a bit too much for my lone braincell so I'm gonna let these two make up their minds before I start believing any of this. I'm sure every Liverpool fan would be gutted to see Stevie go, even though it might work for us with the extra cash that his sale could bring. I hope he stays. I really do. Watching him work his arse off for us in Istanbul was amazing. How could we let him go after THAT night in Turkey??

In other important news,
Zenden has signed for Liverpool.

Lindsay Lohan Health Watch

I reckon its a hopeless case now.

[Feed Lindsay]

Happy Birthday America

To All Our American Readers!

As we approach this July 4th holiday there are different emotions for most people, depending in part on where they are in their life’s journey and what is impacting their quality of life.

For everyone, the holiday can be a fun time, filled with activities on the lake, in backyards around the city and in our park at the Freedom Festival.

Fireworks, good food and fellowship are all a part of the celebration, not to mention in means a day off work for many.

But this year, just as the celebration begins, we hear that another middle Tennessee soldier has lost his life somewhere overseas in a place that just a few years ago some of us could not even spell — Afghanistan. [Continue]

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