Saturday, December 31, 2005

Happy New Year!

Friday, December 30, 2005

Gollum said come fourth, Benitez said we'll take the cup instead

Gollum interviewed by Sky at home, complete with champagne in hand after finishing fourth last season.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Crouch not awarded goal against Everton.

Peter Crouch was, once again, in the midst of goal mouth confusion this evening as Liverpool ran out 3-1 winners against Everton, in the Merseyside Derby.

Leigh Canaesee, of the press association, who previously denied 2 of Crouch's goals had the following to say:

"When Crouch rounds the 'keeper, you can see that he [the keeper] clearly brushes a blade of grass which in turn brushes another blade of grass, which itself then spins the ball in the opposite direction it was going to. It was clearly going to be a goal kick as the ball was about to go out."

Peter Crouch made the following comment himself:

"Are you kiddin'? Seriously hasn't this press association seen me in the last 2 games? 2, yes TWO, yellow cards... wait 'til I get my hands on this Canaesee fella'"

Steven Gerrard and Djibril Cisse completed the score, whilst Beattie scored for the blueshite... erm, I mean Everton.

Match Report

Watch the goals:
Peter Crouch
Steven Gerrard
Lord of the Manor of Frodsham, Djibril Cisse

Wednesday, December 28, 2005


Here are the TEN NOMINEES for BABE OF THE YEAR 2005!

Your chance to make a difference!

You can VOTE by scrolling down to the poll.

Click on the NAMES of the NOMINEES to view MORE pics.

You can vote until MIDNIGHT on DECEMBER 30th!


Adriana Lima

Eva Mendes

Cheryl Tweedy

Alessandra Ambrosio

Elisha Cuthbert

Aishwarya Rai

Lindsay Lohan

Lucy Pinder

Jennifer Ellison

Jessica Simpson

And here are the REST of 2005's BABES OF THE DAY!

December 2005
Lucy Pinder
Katrina Kaif
Kristianna Loken
Aishwarya Rai
Nauheed Cyrusi
Maria Sharapova
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Alba
Alessandra Ambrosio
Britney Spears
Jennifer Ellison

November 2005
Selma Hayek
Tina O'Brien
Kirsty Gallacher
Veronika Varekova
Victoria Pratt
Brooke Burns
Brittany Murphy
Petra Nemcova
Adriana Lima

October 2005
Louise Redknapp
Jodie Marsh

September 2005
Hillary Duff
Kate Moss
Maggie Grace
Eva Mendes
Leslie Bibb
Sarah Manners
Natalie Portman
Ali Landry
Scarlet Johansen
Gemma Atkinson
Michelle Ryan

August 2005
Tiffany Mulheron
Abi Titmuss
Anna Kournikova
Hannah Graaf
Kristianna Loken
Eva Longoria
Eva Mendes
Veronica Verakova
Vida Guerra
Sara Spraker
Liz Hurley
Milla Jovovich
Josie Maran
Jessica Simpson

July 2005
Jessica Alba
Lucy Pinder
Denise Richards
Paris Hilton
Kelly Brook
Cheryl Tweedy
Rose Mcgowan
Gisele Bundchen
Veronica Zemanova
Vida Guerra
Rachel Stevens
Elisha Cuthbert
Kristin Kreuk

June 2005
Estella Warren
Heather Graham
Leah Remini
Brooke Burke
Anjelina Jolie
Keira Augustina
Yamila Diaz
Jennifer Ellison
Lindsay Lohan
Katie Holmes
Laetitia Casta

May 2005
Carmen Electra
Atomic Kitten
Adriana Lima
Katherine Heigl
Eva Green
Shannon Elizabeth
Kylie Minogue
Eliza Dushku
Adriana Sklenarikova
Elisha Cuthbert

April 2005
Alessandra Ambrosio
Cheryl Tweedy
Jennifer Ellison
Sofia Vergara
Cat Deely
Penelope Cruz

March 2005
Kate Moss
Eva Mendes

Peter Crouch - School Photo

Essien is a Dirty Twat!

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Things we've done

Thanks Shaima for passing this on. Whoever's readin this, you gotta copy the list and highlight the things you've done from it, and at the end add three more.

Mine are the ones in Orange

01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02. Swam with dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said ‘I love you’ and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Done a striptease
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long, and watched the sunrise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19. Touched an iceberg
20. Slept under the stars
21. Changed a baby’s diaper (partially, with help ofcourse)
22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23. Watched a meteor shower
24. Gotten drunk on champagne
25. Given more than you can afford to charity
26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28. Had a food fight

29. Bet on a winning horse
30. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
31. Asked out a stranger
32. Had a snowball fight
33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
35. Held a lamb
36. Enacted a favorite fantasy
37. Taken a midnight skinny dip
38. Taken an ice cold bath/shower
39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40. Seen a total eclipse
41. Ridden a roller coaster
42. Hit a home run (have hit loads of sixes in cricket, yes)
43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
45. Adopted an accent for an entire day
46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48. Had two hard drives for your computer

49. Visited all 50 states
50. Loved your job for all accounts
51. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53. Had amazing friends
54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
55. Watched wild whales
56. Stolen a sign
57. Backpacked in Europe
58. Taken a road-trip
59. Rock climbing
60. Lied to foreign government’s official in that country to avoid notice
61. Midnight walk on the beach
62. Sky diving
63. Visited Ireland
64. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love
65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
66. Visited Japan
67. Bench-pressed your own weight
68. Milked a cow
69. Alphabetized your records
70. Pretended to be a superhero
71. Sung karaoke
72. Lounged around in bed all day
73. Posed nude in front of strangers
74. Scuba diving
75. Got it on to "Let’s Get It On" by Marvin Gaye
76. Kissed in the rain
77. Played in the mud
78. Played in the rain

79. Gone to a drive-in theatre
80. Done something you should regret, but don’t regret it
81. Visited the Great Wall of China
82. Discovered that someone who’s not supposed to know about your blog has discovered your blog
83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better
84. Started a business
85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86. Toured ancient sites
87. Taken a martial arts class
88. Sword fought for the honor of a woman.
89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
90. Gotten married
91. Been in a movie
92. Crashed a party
93. Loved someone you shouldn’t have
94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy

95. Gotten divorced
96. Had sex at the office
97. Lied
97. (the real 97) Gone without food for 5 days
98. Made cookies from scratch
99. Won first prize in a costume contest
100. Ridden a gondola in Venice
101. Gotten a tattoo
102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on
103. Rafted the Snake River
104. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
105. Got flowers for no reason
107. Got so drunk you don’t remember anything
108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug
109. Performed on stage
110. Been to Las Vegas
111. Recorded music
112. Eaten shark
113. Had a one-night-stand
114. Gone to Thailand
115. Seen Moulin Rouge
116. Bought a house
117. Been in a combat zone
118. Buried one/both of your parents
120. Been on a cruise ship
121. Spoken more than one language fluently
122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123. Bounced a check
124. Performed in Rocky Horror
125. Read - and understood - your credit report
126. Raised children
127. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy
128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
129. Created and named your own constellation of stars
130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did
132. Called or written your Congressperson
133. Packed up and moved to another city to just start over
134. …more than once?

135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
137. Had an abortion, or your female partner did
138. Had plastic surgery
139. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
140. Wrote articles for a large publication
141. Lost over 100 pounds
142. Held someone while they were having a flashback
143. Piloted an airplane
144. Petted a stingray
145. Broken someone’s heart
146. Helped an animal give birth
147. Been fired or laid off from a job
148. Won money on a T.V. game show
149. Broken a bone
150. Killed a human being
151. Gone on an African photo safari
152. Ridden a motorcycle
153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of 100mph or faster?
154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155. Fired a rifle, shotgun or pistol
156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157. Ridden a horse
158. Had major surgery.
159. Had sex on a moving train
160. Had a snake as a pet
161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162. Slept through an entire flight: take, landing, during
163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
165. Visited all 7 continents
166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167. Eaten kangaroo meat
168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
170. Eaten sushi
171. Had your picture in the newspaper
172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
174. Gotten someone fired for his or her actions

175. Gone back to school
176. Parasailed
177. Changed your name
178. Petted a cockroach
179. Eaten fried green tomatoes
180. Read The Iliad
181. Selected one "important" author whom you missed in school, and read him/ her
182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183. …and gotten 86'ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184. Taught yourself an art from scratch
185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
187. Skipped all your school reunions
188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
189. Been elected to public office
190. Written your own computer language
191. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193. Built your own PC from parts
194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you.
195. Had a booth at a street fair
196. Dyed your hair
197: Been a DJ
198: Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal
199: Written your own role playing game
200: Lost your Best Friend for reasons of death
201: Fallen in love over the internet
202: Sung in a Barbers’ Shop Quartet
203: Eaten a live animal
204: Been able to communicate in a language you barely learnt barely three days earlier.
205: Memorized words from all Disney movies like Aladdin, Lionking etc; furthmore, dialogues from Friends, Smallville and Star Trek
206: Be able to relate to every song that you ever listen.
207: Part-owned a lapdancing club
208: Carried a loaded weapon for self-defence
209: Spent a night in the nick

Liverpool 2 - 0 Newcastle

Michael Owen's return turned out to be a non-event really, from Newcastle's point of view. Liverpool were all over them from the first minute and completely dominated a game which could've been 5-0 if it wasn't for Given's superb goalkeeping, clearly their best player on the pitch. Gerrard with a thumping finish in the 14th minute and Anfield goal machine Peter Crouch with a headed effort that was fumbled by Given and just crossed the line.

Second half, and Bowyer brought Alonso down with an 'iffy' challenge, nothing career threatening, although Crouch must've seen something as he retaliated with a soft push that saw Bowyer take a tumble. Shearer, the cunt (yes he's a cunt) attacked Croucinho from behind and that was when Stevie Gerrard first jumped Shearer and then tried to strangle Bowyer while Carra was busy telling Shearer where to get off.

On another day, Gerrard and Croucinho would've both been sent off but here, only Crouch got a yellow. Bowyer was sent off though which made me feel a little sorry for him as his challenge didn't warrant a red, he got pushed, strangled and sent off for it.

I don't think his challenge justified the sending off, although the fact that he's a cunt probably did.

Here's the video: Gerrard and Carra make Shearer and Bowyer look like little girls

Oh and did I mention Owen? Not really, cuz there isn't much to be said about his return to Anfield except that he had plenty of time to stand and watch the side that he chose to leave in pursuit of glory, thrash his current team in style.

What must be going through his mind?

Monday, December 26, 2005

Babe of the Day - Lucy Pinder


Watch this video for a compilation of some of the best (or is it worst?) cockups in football.

20 Ways to make his XXXMas

I'm a day late on this but fuck it, its good enough - just spotted this on BadGirl's Hotbox and I just had to post it. Brilliant work, BadGirl.

1. Trim his tree.

2. Lick his luscious candy cane.

3. Be his "ho-ho-ho" for the holidays.

4. Polish his christmas balls.

5. Ride him like a reindeer.

6. Taste his sweet egg-nog.

7. Deck the halls with moans of pleasure.

8. Fa, la, la, latio- la, la, la, la.

9. Spark his menorah with a hot strip tease.

10. Request a stiff stocking stuff-her!

11. Make his Kris Kringle tingle.

12. Gift wrap yourself in sexy lingere.

13. Unwrap his package.

14. Hang mistletoe from any place you want kissed.

15. Rock his jingle bells in the frosty air.

16. Make your Rudolph's hose as red as his nose.

17. Heat him up with a snow job.

18. Give the Christmas carolers a show of your own.

19. Dress up as Santa's nasty little helper.

20. Make sure you're naughty, so it's nice.

Banned Cover Art

Bruce Springsteen
Born in the U.S.A. (1984)

Some critics call for a ban because they believe "The Boss" is pissing on the flag.

More Banned Covers from the Bad Girl's Hotbox!

Video of the Day - Polaroid Prank

Best Sports Quotes of 2005

I've not been to bed yet. Behind these sunglasses there's a thousand stories.
Freddie Flintoff on the Ashes celebrations.

I've got to get through a night with Freddie Flintoff before I can think about anything else!
England captain Michael Vaughan responds to questions about the winter tour.

It was me who got the marker pen out... anyone who falls asleep on the team bus knows the dangers.
Steve Harmison explains how Freddie gained a beard, moustache and glasses - not to mention a rude word across his forehead - when he got off the England coach after the celebrations.

I'm going to say hello to two friends who I've shut out of my life for the past 10 weeks, while I trained the hardest I've ever done for a fight. So welcome back Mr Guinness and Mr Dom Perignon.
Ricky Hatton gets reacquainted with some old pals after his stunning defeat of Kostya Tszyu to win the IBF light-welterweight crown.

We went from looking like the Dog and Duck to Real Madrid.
Ian Holloway on the Jekyll and Hyde performance of his QPR side, who came from two down to draw with Hull.

I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
A classic quote from George Best, who sadly died in November.

That means I can drive a flock of sheep through the town centre, drink for free in no less than 64 pubs and get a lift home with the police when I become inebriated - what more could you want?
Freddie on what being given the freedom of his home town, Preston, means to him.

They should start the matches at 8am because then you could stay up all night!
Jimmy White with an ironic slant on early starts at the UK Championship in York after crashing out following a 10am slot.

As far as his shoulder is concerned he is going to be OK. He didn't have any trouble lifting up a can of beer anyway.
Chairman of selectors David Graveney gives Freddie Flintoff the all-clear for Old Trafford.

Is he entitled to go dance with his wife at a do? Yes he is. Does he need some help with his dance moves? Obviously he does. We will do some more movement to music in training.
Crystal Palace manager Iain Dowie defends striker Andrew Johnson after tabloid photographers snap him on a night out.

If people come to your window and talk to your wife every night, you can't accept it without asking what is happening. Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger on the alleged tapping-up of Ashley Cole by Chelsea.

The only threats I've had this week have been from the wife for not doing the washing up.
Southampton boss Harry Redknapp when asked if he had received any threats in the build-up to the derby clash with his former club Portsmouth.

How can you tell your wife you are just popping out to play a match and then not come back for five days?
Liverpool manager Rafael Benitez ponders the mysteries of Test cricket.

I've walked into restaurants with my wife to the roar of 'Psycho! Psycho!' - they expect me to respond with a two-fisted salute, but I just put my head down in embarrassment and walk past.
Manchester City boss Stuart Pearce is trying to leave his past behind him.

I had a commitment to his mum that his face would not get changed, so that was the only disappointing element for me.
Great Britain coach Brian Noble on the nose injury suffered by scrum-half Paul Deacon in the win over New Zealand.

My mother told me there would be days like these. She just didn't tell me when and how many.
Sunderland boss Mick McCarthy after his side conceded a 94th-minute equaliser to West Brom when on the verge of their elusive first victory in the Premiership this season.

I really like her family - they are all pretty cool. Let's be fair, it's not bad that they own a pub either!
Rugby ace Gavin Henson on life with Charlotte Church.

This one's for Victoria Beckham - we've heard she likes a drink.
Welsh rappers Goldie Lookin Chain dedicate new single Your Missus Is A Nutter to Posh Spice before the Wales-England game in Cardiff.

If she needs me to string a few guitars, I'll be happy to do whatever I can to help. Why not go hanging on a rock 'n' roll tour for a while, drink beer and have fun?
Lance Armstrong retires after his seventh straight Tour de France win and looks forward to hanging around with rock star girlfriend Sheryl Crow.

He has said he will quit but, listen, I said I loved my wife when I left her this morning. Things change.
Newcastle chairman Freddy Shepherd correctly predicts Alan Shearer will reverse his decision to retire.

One of the reasons I like to do well here is because I know I will talk to you afterwards. I have a bit of a crush on you.
Andy Roddick chats up Sue Barker after winning his third successive Queen's title.

You have made my day, you have made my year...I'm sure my husband wouldn't mind!
Sue laps up the attention.

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Rafa: My Christmas message to fans

Wherever in the world you're reading this, I'd like to take a small moment out of your Christmas Day to wish all our supporters around the globe all the best for the festive period.

I'd heard a lot about the amazing reputation of the Liverpool supporters even before I joined the club last summer and this year you've proved to me, my staff and the players just why you're held in such high regard around the world.

It's been an incredible year - we've had some bad days but the great days and nights like the victories over Olympiacos, Juventus, Chelsea and, of course, the final in Istanbul are the memories I'll take from 2005.

The scenes at Anfield when we beat Olympiacos and then Chelsea to reach the final are very hard for me to put into words. My English is improving all the time but even I find it hard to describe the emotions that you fans brought out in me on those nights.

Even at half-time in Istanbul, you never gave up on us and that is why I always say that the win over AC Milan is as much down to you as it was the players and staff at pitch level.

I have always believed that success only comes to those who work as a team and at Liverpool I believe the fans are very much part of our team. The joy on the faces of the fans when we toured the city on the open top bus after arriving back from Turkey will live with me, my staff and the players for the rest of our lives.

Lifting the European Cup has only made me more hungry for success at Liverpool. I want to see the same look on the faces of the fans again next year and I can promise everyone reading this that we will work harder than ever to bring back even more silverware to Anfield.

Thank you for you support in 2005. Let's make 2006 even better still.

Happy Christmas,


20 tricks to Xmas-Proof your body

CHRISTMAS isn't just tough on your pocket, it can be tough on your body, too.

This week, one in three of us will get a hangover, five million will suffer from indigestion and up to one in five will catch a chesty cough or bronchitis.

It's the combination of excess alcohol, fatty food and sugary treats that take their toll.

So here are 20 ways to health-proof your body and sail through the silly season...

WHEN the Quality Street chocs come out, choose the milk chocolate hazelnut (the blue one). It's the healthiest of the lot because hazelnuts supply anti-ageing vitamin E.

SHAKING hands at parties may well give you a cold. The virus is passed from one person's nasal drips to either your nasal lining or your eyes. So when introductions are over, dash to the loo, wash your hands and in the meantime, resist touching your eyes or nose.

SPICY party foods and alcohol are bad news if you're prone to cystitis. This is because they irritate the bladder. So drink cranberry juice - condensed tannins block the bacteria. Vodka and cranberry is a better mix than trad V&T.

YES, drinking a glass of milk before boozing really can save you from the mother of all hangovers. It keeps the stomach busy digesting for longer, so alcohol isn't absorbed as quickly as it otherwise would be.

DRINKING sports drinks to replace sugar and salts lost when we're dehydrated will help get rid ofthat wobbly, morning-after feeling. Eating before you go out also reduces hangover symptoms.

POST-party munchies, such as a kebab or curry, may well bring on indigestion. So avoid eating after 10pm. And use an extra pillow to reduce night-time indigestion. By propping your head up, you will reduce the flow of acids upwards from the stomach.

IF you haven't time to eat before you go out, at least grab a banana. This will boost blood sugar and provide energy. It will also reduce alcohol absorption and give a potassium boost to lower blood pressure.

GETTING organised for Christmas can be a nightmare. And when we're stressed, we use up more B vitamins - which can lead to cracking at the corners of the mouth. Keep your mouth mistletoe-fresh by eating B2-rich brown rice, fortified breakfast cereal and green leafy veg.

ALOE Vera has been used to treat indigestion for 3,000 years, so try gulping some down before a big meal. Another benefit is the juice's immune boosting properties. It can stimulate the body's macrophages - large cells that are part of the defence system. Try Aloe Pura Aloe Vera Juice.

DASHING about, alcohol and late nights will take their toll on your skin. So eat oily fish, such as mackerel and salmon, which are rich in skin-boosting essential fatty acids as well as selenium, a powerful antioxidant that helps prevent wrinkle-forming free radicals.

IF sausage-rolls, chicken wings and crisps make up a significant part of your diet at the moment, take a vitamin and mineral supplement. Holland & Barrett Timed Release Super One (£8.69 for 50) came out top in our tests.

A WEEKEND nap will stop you getting too run down. The best time to nap is between 2-5pm and 10-40 minutes is the perfect sleep time - it relaxes body and mind for just long enough.

WHEN the nibbles are handed round, go for the pineapple on sticks. This fruit contains digestive enzymes which reduce bloating, indigestion and wind. Papaya and kiwi fruit also contain these useful enzymes.

FOR a Christmas cocktail, opt for anything containing pomegranate juice. This is the latest trendy drink as it has magical health boosting properties - it can dissolve arterial plaque build-up that triggers heart disease.

IF you've been going OTT on the celebrations, give yourself a break. Drink lots of water to flush out the toxins and get a good night's sleep. Natural energy boosters such as nuts, dried apricots, raisins and Californian prunes are a rich source of protective antioxidants. And with your batteries recharged, Christmas Day will be far less painful.

NOBODY pretends smoking, or being in a a smoky atmosphere, is a good thing. Each cigarette uses 25mg of vitamin C, so 10 a day equals 250mg - as much as you get from three or four oranges. Drink a large glass of freshly squeezed orange juice (squeezed yourself) or take a vitamin C tablet.

THE traditional festive lunch isn't as unhealthy as you'd expect. Turkey, especially the white meat, is very low in fat, sprouts are high in B and C vitamins, and carrots are a great source of the anti- oxidant beta-carotene. Avoid too much saturated fat by roasting potatoes in olive oil rather than lard and have your pud with custard. If you want second helpings, choose veggies - a portion of carrots has only 20 calories.

LIQUEURS and designer drinks are dangerous for slimmers - a 25ml pub measure of Bailey's contains 155 calories, so the tipple you pour out at home could contain 300. Instead try Tia Maria (75cals) with iced coffee, topped with a spoonful of low-fat fromage frais and grated nutmeg.

WHEN doing the last-minute shopping, carry the presents for as long as you can... because you'll burn 330 calories an hour that way. And at the office party, don't hang out by the bar - get on the dance floor where you'll burn off 300 calories an hour.

ALCOHOL makes the blood vessels dilate, giving you bloodshot eyes. Smoky atmospheres make it worse. To get rid of bags or dark circles, put slices of cucumber on your eyes and relax for 10 minutes. It is a natural astringent with high mineral and water content that will nourish and tighten the skin around eyes.
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