Friday, March 25, 2005

Whats my age again?

At 12:00 Midnight tonight, Evil D will be 23. (March 26 1982)

I have been one acquainted with the night.
I have walked out in rain -- and back in rain.
I have outwalked the furthest city light.
I have looked down the saddest city lane.
I have passed by the watchman on his beat
And dropped my eyes, unwilling to explain.

I have stood still and stopped the sound of feet
When far away an interrupted cry
Came over houses from another street,

But not to call me back or say good-bye;
And further still at an unearthly height,
O luminary clock against the sky

Proclaimed the time was neither wrong nor right.
I have been one acquainted with the night.
Robert Frost (Also born on March 26th)

Here's some less famous people who share the same birthday

Robert Frost - 1874–1963, American poet.
Edward Bellamy - author (1850)
A. E. Housman - poet and scholar (1859)
James Bryant Conant - educator (1893)
Tennessee Williams - dramatist (1911)
Sandra Day O'Connor - jurist (1930)
Dan the man - Mack Daddy (1982)
Alan Arkin - actor, director (1934)
Diana Ross - singer (1944)
Steven Tyler - musician (1948)
Martin Short - actor, producer (1950)

And here's something I wouldn't normally wanna admit, I don't wanna miss a thing by Steven Tyler - Aerosmith, (born on March 26th, 1948), is one of my all time favourite songs for its beautiful lyrics.

I could stay awake just to hear your breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While you're far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cuz I'll miss you babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cuz even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you babe
And i don't wanna miss a thing

Laying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then i kiss your eyes
And thank God we're together
I just want to stay with you in this moment forever

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cuz I'll miss you babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cuz even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
I just wanna be with you
Right here with you just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment for all the rest of time
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cuz I'll miss you babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cuz even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

I'd still miss you babe
And i don't wanna miss a thing

Two years...

"We try to put it out of our heads, but it comes back anyway. We sit around sometimes, when there’s no electricity, or when we’re gathered for lunch or dinner and someone will say, “Remember two years ago when…” Remember when they bombed Mansur, a residential area… When they started burning the cars in the streets with Apaches… When they hit the airport with that bomb that lit up half of the city… When the American tanks started rolling into Baghdad…? Remember when the fear was still fresh- and the terror was relatively new- and it was possible to be shocked and awed in Iraq?"

An insider's account on the first two years of the American occupation of Iraq, read more on Baghdad Burning

100 Worst songs of the past 15 years

96. "Oops! I Did it Again" by Britney Spears

Erick: I could only pick one Britney song, and the sound clip shows you why this is the winner. Oops! I Did it Again was her launch from one-hit-wonder to superstar, and we bought it. We should've let her sink when we had the chance.
Josephus: This song is like masturbating, everyone likes it they just don't want to admit it.
Bella: People don't like Oops I did it again? What the hell is wrong with these people?

The complete list of the 100 worst songs of the last 15 years. Thanks Badger

Which songs makes YOU wanna throw up? Add yours in the comments

Joke of the Day

A drunk is refused a drink in a bar, so he undertakes to prove to the barman that he is sober.

He gestures toward a cat near the doorway and says, "You see that cat coming in the door? It has two eyes. If I were drunk, I'd see four!"

The bartender looks, then pauses a moment. Finally he responds, "You're drunker than I thought!", taking the rest of the alcohol away, "That cat isn't coming in, it's going out!"

Angelina Jolie: World's Sexiest Woman by FHM

STUNNING actress Angelina Jolie has been named the sexiest woman in the world by the American FHM magazine. The Tomb Raider star beat fellow action woman Jennifer Garner to the top spot in the coveted list by the US version of Britain's popular men's magazine

Editor Scott Gramling said: "Angelina Jolie embodies everything that our readers find incredibly sexy.

Top 25

1. Angelina Jolie
2. Jennifer Garner
3. Paris Hilton
4. Charlize Theron
5. Halle Berry
6. Alyssa Milano
7. Teri Hatcher
8. Pamela Anderson
9. Scarlett Johansson
10. Lindsay Lohan
11. Keira Knightly
12. Salma Hayek
13. Cameron Diaz
14. Leeann Tweedon
15. Mariah Carey
16. Jessica Simpson
17. Beyonce Knowles
18. Carmen Electra
19. Maria Sharapova
20. Jennifer Love Hewitt
21. Jessica Biel
22. Jessica Alba
23. Brooke Burke
24. Jenna Jameson
25. Heidi Klum

She is also today's BABE OF THE DAY. Click here for the full picture gallery

50 ways to look good when naked

Things you NEVER hear women say

- I know it's a lot tighter back there but would you please try again?

- That was a great fart! Do another one!

- No, I'm not going to buy those shoes I've got enough already!

- If you think she's fit, go ahead and shag her then!

- You look tired, I'll go and wash up while you unwind.

- No, that's all right, I'll do it

- Paris? At this time of year? No thanks!

- It's alright, he's probably just out with the lads. I'll call him tomorrow instead"

- Here's the change.

- I was going to buy a black bag to go with that dress, but then I realised I had 14000 black bags in my wardrobe upstairs.

- Just goin the shopping centre. Back in five mins

- Tonight, can you cum on my face and tits?

- Argh!!!! Some bastard just kicked me nuts.

- The impact of the oil crisis on the socio-economics of the regional market town of Horrigant in the east of Mongolia with its damage to the youth due to lack of oppertunities to arise within the close linked nomad tribes within the Gobi desert.

- Can you put the football on please?

- Would you like another beer?

- Would you like a blowjob with your beer while you watch the football?

- My round.

- Let's stay up all night, smoking weed, drinking lager and playing playstation- then lets go upstairs and you can do your funny little sex dance

- Yes dear, I'd love a golden shower.

- Have a good evening with your mates down the pub, i'll be gagging for sex by the time you get back

- Let's pee write our names in the snow.

- You're right.

- Yay. I was hoping you'd rent a Bruce Lee movie

- I admit it, I was wrong.

- I said I didn't want any chips and ,though yours smell nice, I'm not going to try and eat yours

- Here's £50, go buy yourself something nice.

- Quick, quick, the footy is about to start. Don't worry I've already got you a beer.

- Please shag my two best mates together.. I want to prove how great you are in bed

- Sometimes I wish I was only 3 ft. tall, had wheels, a flat head you could balance a pint on and lips like Angelina Jolie

- I'm so impressed that you can flick the condom into the bin without moving from bed!!

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Babe of the Day - Eva Mendes

The second most beautiful woman in the world makes yet another appearence on This is Anfield. Click here for the full gallery.

Freedom of Speech - US Style

Kids say the best things..!

A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil. "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently. "You did WHAT?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."
A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later....."Da-ad...." "What?" "I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?" "No, you had your chance before Lights out." Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad...." "WHAT?" "I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??" "I told you NO! If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!" Five minutes later......"Daaaa-aaaad....." "WHAT!" "When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?"
An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"
The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!'"
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug.
"I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."
It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward.
One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?" The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, "Yes and my Mom says it's a bitch to iron."
When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!"
I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy." "I know," she replied, "but what's growing in your butt?"
A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine...."
His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?" The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework, Mom." "And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered . Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in math?" The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?" After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."
One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ".. and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, ' The sky is falling, the sky is falling! '"
The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?" One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy Shit! A talking chicken!'" The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.
A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren't you Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?" She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."
A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."
The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"
A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father she stands next to the barber chair, while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack cake. The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you're going to get hair on your Twinkie." She says, "Yes, I know, and I'm going to get boobs too."

nicked from The Convict

Inetertsnig Fcat

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

From SoWeirdProductions who thinks I'm weird(ish)

Wednesday, March 23, 2005


The Coconut man thread is going on strongly than ever with an average of 10-20 Coconut men being added DAILY!

Here are some of the latest new additions

Some custom-made T-shirts by a Forummer.

And here are some MORE coconut men (note: these are a select pick from nearly 50 added in the last couple of days.

Sign reads: "I want to take coconutgirl up the ass"
ermm.. we wouldn't advise that fella... its probably a bloke anyway

Sign reads: "Coconutman is my best mate, Jim xxx"
Coconutman don't have no mates Jim. xxx

Sign reads: "I'm the coconut man"
Yes you are. Yes you are!

Sign reads: "I am a COOKIE man" (??)
Taking the biscuit now, are we?

Sign reads: "Coconutman sprayed milk in my eye" (??)

Sign reads: "F365 made me her bitch" (??)
Yes we did, YES we did!

And the first COCONUT SONG with its very own video!

Babe of the Day - Kelly Brook

Chav Jokes!

What do you call a chav in a box? Innit.

What do you call a chav in a filing cabinet? Sorted

What do you call a chav in a box with a lock on it? Safe.

What do you call an Eskimo chav? Innuinnit.

Why are Chavs like slinkies? They have no real use but it's great to watch one fall down a flight of stairs.

What do you call a Chavette in a white tracksuit? The bride.

You're in your car and you see a Chav on a bike, why should you try not to hit him? It might be your bike.

What's the difference between a Chav and a coconut? One's thick and hairy, the other's a coconut.

What's the first question at a Chav quiz night? What you lookin' at?

How do you get 100 Chavs into a phone box? Paint three stripes on it.

Two Chavs in a car without any music. Who's driving? The police

What do you call a chav with 9 GCSE's? A liar.

What do you say to a chav with a job? Can I have a big mac please

What do you say to a chav in a suit? Will the defendant please stand

What do u call a knife in chaville? Exhibit A

Why is 3 chavs going over a cliff in a Nova a shame? A Nova seats 4

What do you call a 30 year old chavette? Granny.

How many chavs does it take to change a lightbulb? One, they'll screw anything.

What do you call 100 chavs at the bottom of a river? A start.

How many chavs does it take to clean a floor? None, "That's some uvver bleeders job innit."

Why did the chav take a shower? He didn't mean to, he just forgot to close the Nova's window in the car wash

Why did the Chav cross the road? To start a fight with a random stranger for no reason whatsoever.

What do you call a Chav at college? The cleaner.

A bus full of Chavs were driving through Wales. As they were approaching Llanfgogogferrinfourasoch they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one Chav asked the blonde employee, "Before we order, could you settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly?" - The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said, "Burrrrrrrr-gerrrrrrr-Kiiiiing."

Two chavs jump off beachy head, who wins? Society.

From the brilliant Convict

No 1.

The World Health Organization has released a study that verifies the United States is the undisputed champion in mental illness.
America Rules

from The Badger's Bastion

Jamie Carragher, Topless!

Personally, I'm more interested in what Jamie C's gotta do on the pitch than what he looks like with this top off, but there are people who have reached my blog while searching for exactly that. A few days ago someone from Japan was looking for Stevie G's naked snaps. Aint that just sick? C'mon people, own up, and maybe I'll post em on for you.


For those of you who are into all that, here's a collection of Topless Footballers

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

You are not gonna believe this..!

First there was the Official T Shirt. Now, everything from Dog T-Shirts, Wall Clocks, Baby T Shirts, Aprons, Hats to Bumper Stickers are now available

Babe of the Day - Alessandra Ambrosio

Babe of the days makes a much awaited return after a long absence... Click here for the full gallery.

Martin Mubanga: My Hero :: By RunOverByTheTruth

You might not have seen or heard of Martin Mubanga. Until recently he was out of the public eye for some time. Way, way out of the public eye.

He was a prisoner in Guantanamo for three years.

Martin was one of the four British detainees freed in January. There's a great interview with him in the Observer, so impressive that I couldn't choose which bits to quote - Martin's story deserves to be read in full.

He's not my hero for being in Guantanamo - that's a tragedy he didn't choose. He's not my hero for the brave way he stood up to torture, even though his strength is amazing - I'd excuse anyone who lost it under those circumstances, even though Martin didn't lose it, because you can't expect anyone to withstand such treatment. I can't imagine that I would.

Martin is my hero for what he's doing now.

A man who has endured three years of captivity and torture could be excused for taking it easy when he got out. Taking it easy and lying low. Never saying anything about anything, especially not about, say, Guantanamo, the government, the war in Iraq.

So where was Martin today?

He was at a Stop the War Coalition press conference, called to publicise the demo on Saturday.

Lindsey German, convenor of the Stop the War Coalition, points out just one of the obstacles in the way.

"We are delighted that Martin is able to join our battle against this war on terror. The fact that we don't know whether he can even be with us on Monday because of the threat of a Home Office control order hanging over him this weekend, shows just how far the government is willing to go to restrict our civil liberties."

After the press conference he went to the Home Office - up high on my list of places not to go, given his circumstances - to present a petition demanding the release of five other prisoners who were British residents before the US seized and incarcerated them in Guantanamo.

That's why Martin is my hero. He comes out of Guantano and not only keeps fighting for the people he left behind, but speaks out against the war and occupation of Iraq. Brave, brave man.

Martin is also a rapper - he wants to make a record of the raps he composed in Guantanamo. I want that record. So last words from Martin:

And I got no love for the American government
Dey can go suck and I don't mean peppermint.
Now hear da bombs drop
As de Muslim babies, dem a die,
Now hear de bombs drop
As de Muslim mothers dem a cry
Now hear de bombs drop
As de Muslim soldiers dem a fly
Why? Because dey no want fe die.

from the RedOne at Run over by the Truth

More Simpsons quotes - from the 365 Forum


1. Grandpa: My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.

2. Homer: [drunk] Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.

3. Grandpa: Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three.P.S. I am not a crackpot.

4. Homer: There's your giraffe, little girl.Ralph Wiggum: I'm a boy.Homer: That's the spirit. Never give up.

5. Mr. Burns: Woah, slow down there maestro. There's a *New* Mexico?

6. Grandpa Simpson: The last time the meteors came, we thought the sky was on fire. Naturally, we blamed the Irish. We hanged more 'n a few.

7. Homer: If The Flintstones has taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement.

8. Ralph: When I grow up I'm going to Bovine University.

9. Titanya: But Duffman, you said if I slept with you I wouldn't have to touch the drunk!Duffman: Duffman... says a lot of things! Oh, yeah!

10. Homer: The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother! I call him Gamblor, and it's time to snatch your mother from his neon claws!

There's many more here

Coconut Man update

I have copied the coconut man stuff to another blog entirely dedicated to the cause.

The link is on the side menu.


The Magic of Photoshop


Checkout the absolute TERROR on the guys face behind her!!

Someone posted this on a forum of some real talented photoshoppers.

Checkout what they came up with

Quest for Eligible Cop

A woman used the new Freedom of Information Act to satisfy her passion for men in uniforms.

Angela Wright emailed Hampshire Police asking for the details of eligible bachelors in the force aged between 35 and 49. She asked for their email addresses, salaries and pensions.

Under the act, Angela was able to make the request using a a pseudonym - "ilikemeninuniforms". Read More...

Sleep your way to Sexess

Having sex with your boss is increasingly being seen as a good way to get ahead at work.

A survey of 2,000 employees for Nuts magazine found that 21% would be prepared to sleep with a superior in order to gain promotion. Read more...

Monday, March 21, 2005

Breaking News

The Editor, Football 365
Well, here it is...

I know you'll all have about 28 other ideas for Coconut Man t-shirts but we can't satisfy everyone. Unlike F365Goer.

And we can't use people's pics willy-nilly without permission.

If you do have any sensible suggestions then mail


Sunday, March 20, 2005


For those of you wondering what the hell has happened to this otherwise pretty normal and boring blog or if someone has taken over, here's a brief on whats actually going on.

The guys at the football365 forums have excelled themselves this time.

F365 Forum Link Of The Year
Post A Picture Of Your Missus

It's probably best to skip the small print and start on page 13 or there or thereabouts. For the record, F365 in no way condones this despicable behaviour against the coconut men.

In short… a hapless member posted a pic of his missus who is now a minor internet celebrity and bait for the goading of middle aged balding men.
These men have been persuaded to take photographs of themselves with a sign saying “I am Coconut man”

To see how far this has spread already, go to and search for coconut man….
The next logical step for this brilliant enterprise is obviously TV coverage, if you guys can persuade viewers into holding up signs saying “I am coconut man” in the terraces then this can become the stuff of legends!

If you are a blogger, you can copy the above briefing and persuade other bloggers to link this and we can really make this massive.
I Leave it in your capable hands…
UPDATE: Rubber Jon - Click to Enlarge.


Flyer on top designed by PARKER from F365

Forum Update

Here's some more coconut men, thanks to the efforts of Hugh Jarce, Ali and I think Prawnstar too.


They should be getting added to the Official


very soon.

If you haven't already started reading THIS THREAD, do it now! You don't know what you're missing out on.

Here are a couple of wallpapers for all the fans of coconut man.

Created By the Forummers



And a hilarious pic of 'Andrew', posing as COCONUT MAN. Photoshopped ofcourse.

Andrew's Details

Says he's 46. 'we know he's a lying cunt but what a lying cunt'. Married. Possible with Kids. Building Surveyor. In London for one day TODAY. Arriving by a train between 5-6pm at King's Cross. Staying at the St. Giles Hotel in London, 50 yards from Oxford St. 14 stone, 5'9, likes rugby, says he's VERY HAIRY.

Mobile Number: 07957 825514

Oh and our man likes to drive FAST.

The Merseyside Derby. 4:05 pm, Anfield.



Jamie Carragher looked ahead to this afternoon's eagerly anticipated Merseyside derby and insisted: "It's the most important in 20 years."

Dudek: Win or we won't get fourth
Benitez: Prove you can cope with pr...

Evil D's Evil Prediction: 3-1
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